Melanie C - This Time

'Mel C' - pop act. 'Melanie C' - serious artist. 'Melanie Chisolm' - public pronunciation abilities render this a risk.

The first single off this album is bizarrely labelled as a 'bonus track'. Why is it a bonus? It's on the album just the same as all the others. Why aren't the other songs bonus tracks? Why can't this album actually be classed as a single with 12 bonus tracks?

The single in question is entitled 'I Want Candy'. Now I'm not the kind of person who's going to get bothered about the fact that an English artist is using a wholly and uniquely American word - 'candy'. I'm not the sort of person who thinks this is laughable posturing on the part of someone who thinks that the US is 'it' and is pandering to that nation in a shameful and embarrassingly deferential manner.

I'm certainly not the kind of person who's going to advise you all to poo in a bag and post it through Mel C's door with an accompanying note that says 'howdy'.