Aerosmith - Honkin' On Bobo

This falls into the category of things that I don't want explained. Honkin' On Bobo. Clarity would diminish it.

I saw Aerosmith's singer, Steven Tyler, on Wayne's World 2 the other day. He's unbelievably cadaverous. More so than I remember. If you've got a spare oversized mouth lying around, you could probably build a fairly credible Steven Tyler by joining some chicken wing bones together with string and glueing the mouth near the top.

He's like a puppet, most of which has biodegraded. He even moves like he's on strings. And he's got a comedy fake voice, which is clearly a very bad example of ventriloquism.

Aerosmith - The Very Best Of

Just what does Aerosmith actually mean? Let's do a bit of a breakdown. A smith is someone associated with the creation and shaping of items. An Aero is a type of chocolate bar that's predominantly air. So there you have it: These guys make delicious, sweet snacks with bubbles in.

Steven Tyler looks like he could eat about eighty Aeros in one mouthful. Go on! Cram 'em in, Steve! You show the world that the reticulated python isn't the only thing that can swallow a cow in one go.

All of Aerosmith's songs are masterpieces, working on multiple levels. They're like post-modern fables with overdriven guitar. Behold the evidence:

Pink - This is about all sorts of things that are pink.
Love In An Elevator - This is about love in a lift. Aerosmith try and conceal this by cleverly using the word 'elevator', but we're all so worldly-wise and well-read these days that we can see through their subtle wordsmithery.
Walk This Way - This is about walking a certain way. Steve Tyler confusingly demonstrates an entirely different walk to co-singers Run DMC. If you're torn between the two, let's just say that Run DMC's walk is the easier of the two.
Don't Want To Miss A Thing - This perfectly encapsulates that ill-defined emotion when you don't want to miss something and are worried that you might.
Devil's Got A New Disguise - For many bands, this would be about the way we're sometimes seduced into doing things we ought not to. Aerosmith, however, see the world with greater perspective. It's about the devil wearing Groucho Marx-style glasses, moustache and false nose.
Dude (Looks Like A Lady) - This is about a dude who has the appearance of being female.